Time to get Away

I spent the weekend out of town in a quiet little cabin on the Illinois River. It was so peaceful and the perfect cozy space I needed.

I passed out right after I arrived Friday and took a much-needed 4-hour nap! It was great! I was so exhausted. I woke up at about 8:30p. I made some food, relaxed, and enjoyed "me time" I read, worked a bit (shhh), and simply enjoyed my time.

Saturday morning, I slept till 10! Then, I showered and realized it was well water with a good amount of sulfur. Some may say, "Eewww, it smells like eggs!" But I will deal with the smell (it was fairly light) to enjoy all those minerals in the water! It reminded me of a time with my aunt Pat in Colorado. The water makes your skin so soft! My hair looked and felt incredible too! It was a little bonus spa treatment!

Saturday, I hunkered down in my cabin and got to reading and studying. First, I read the Bible - the book of Micah - because why not? Lol. I took the Bible I gave my dad. It became his favorite. It had his notes, highlighted scriptures, and covenants he made with God.

I also took a few of his notebooks - some we almost threw away after his passing. We didn't know what to do with them. He has boxes full of notebooks with every page filled out.

It was a healing experience and an eye-opening one as well. I saw parts of my dad I didn't know existed. I read prayers and decrees and saw the lists he believed God for.

I saw business plans and visions with goals and action steps. Perhaps Dad wasn't as lost as I thought he was. However, I know he was tired. He had been fighting for many years for many things.

I had a few conversations leading up to Friday that I knew came at the right time. Things I needed to pray about, reflect on and work on while I was away.

I went with "a plan" for the weekend, and I realized even though it was all good things, it ultimately was work.

Friday evening, the Lord loved on me and let me know it was okay to stop, breathe, and rest.

I didn't have to return with all these new steps, plans, ideas, etc. Instead, I got to come home rested and refreshed.

Hours passed on Saturday, and I looked up and realized it was already 6:30. I had hardly moved from the couch! I spent so much time in the word, reading, and writing.

I looked down to see one of the goals I had just written down Friday was to walk. So I got dressed and took a nice long walk along the river. It was quite low, but it allowed me to see how vast the river system is when it's full. It was a good experience. It reminded me of my walks with Dad.

We'd walk along the river, lakes, fields, etc., and I would ask many questions about the land, rocks, bugs, fish, literally everything. Dad always had an answer. Those were some of my favorite times with him. For a moment, I felt like I had him back. It was peaceful. My heart was full, and I didn't ache for him. I was simply at peace.

After my walk, I returned and got settled in for the evening. I made some dinner and read the book of Luke.

I think Luke is one of my favorite books of the Bible. So much is discussed in parables that seem easier to understand for me.

The story of Jesus always amazes me. Regina LeBlanc posted a video about friendship, betrayal, and love, and it reminded me of a quote I came across, "Judas ate too."

Hours before the death of Jesus, Judas ate too. Jesus fed Judas. He prayed for Judas. He washed Judas' feet. Jesus knew Judas would betray him, yet he didn't treat him differently.

Luke 23:34 has been one of my favorite verses for many years. I can't comprehend the love and compassion it took for Jesus to be in the most horrible place any person could and would ever experience instead of being angry, spiteful, swearing, etc. Jesus wept for these people and asked God to forgive them, for they know not what they do.

I do my best to reflect on all that Jesus has done for me far beyond a handful of times a year.

However, Easter seems to be when I am in awe of what He did for ME! He went to the cross for all of us.

I've learned I must focus on what Jesus did for ME more often. It's easy to say and accept Jesus died for all of us, but it becomes much more personal when I accept He died for ME.

I watched The Passion of the Christ last night before bed and sat in awe of what He did - so many emotions, thoughts, and feelings.

It reminded me of many songs, but two instantly came to mind.

Hillsong - Grace to Grace

If having my heart was worth the pain

What joy could You see beyond the grave

If love found my soul worth dying for

I was worth the pain. Jesus wanted ME so much that He was willing to die for me.

The second song is Zach William's - Heart of God.

I know you're hurtin'; I can see it in your eyes

So pull back the curtain and take off your disguise

Whoever told you, you ain't worth the fight

The cross tells a story that'll change your mind

'Cause there's only love in the heart of God

No room for shame in His open arms

There's beauty from ashes, so come as you are

And there's only love in the heart of God

Come, prodigal children, it's never too late

Run home to the Father, let Him clothe you with grace And, bury your burdens, break free from your fear. Step out of the shadows, there's no judgment here.

There's only love in the heart of God

No room for shame in His open arms

There's beauty from ashes, so come as you are

And there's only love in the heart of God

No, He's not sittin' there shakin' His head

Writin' you off, leavin' you lost

He's not sittin' there shakin' His head

Wishin' He'd never went to that cross

He's not sittin' there shakin' His head

Writin' you off, leavin' you lost

He's not sittin' there shakin' His head

He went to that cross, He went to that cross

Jesus didn't endure what I will never be able to comprehend for no reason. He didn't go through that to say, well, I sure regret going through all that for Micah.

I've given Jesus every reason not to love me, which has never stopped Him. I've been the prodigal child more times than I can count. Every. Single. Time. God is waiting with open arms. I'm finally to a point in my relationship with God where I'm done running away. I only want to run toward God.

This weekend was incredible. I fully gave my life and heart to God. Full surrender. It's not my will, but His I want for my life.

He revealed many things to me this week, even before I made it to the cabin.

I had confirmation about some things I was confused about.

We often make things about ourselves (even in the right doing) when it has nothing to do with us. Sometimes things happen so the Lord can show you how to pray for something or someone.

I finished my weekend (Sunday/today) by taking Miles to lunch when I returned to town.

We went to Texas Roadhouse and had a wonderful experience! We got there right before the droves of people came after church. We had an excellent server. The food was hot and fresh. Best of all, Miles was talkative, and we had a great time.

We came home and continued our conversation throughout the day, and he helped me clean the house! It felt great to see progress being made. He had a lot of fun making up games as we cleaned.

We finished the day by going to dinner with the family.

Once home, Miles and I finished cleaning. We read part of a military book, his teen Bible, read a devotional, listened to a worship song, and spoke scripture over ourselves together.

This is our nightly routine; he missed it while I was away.

I must say, I am very proud of him! He was nervous about me leaving. The last time I went away for the weekend (a year ago), he had such bad separation anxiety that he was sick the entire weekend.

We talked it out, and I told him he was a whole year older and a different person now. I knew he'd be okay and do great - which he did! He slept with no issues and never got sick once!

Miles took the 5 love languages quiz for kids with me. It helped him to understand what he needs, and he now knows he can ask me or tell me when he needs me to communicate with him in a certain way.

I hope you've enjoyed my latest novel! Lol.

HAPPY EASTER! HE IS RISEN!